Semiprecious
by Nominis Expers
Summary: Aoshi is reflecting on years passed.


Rurouni Kenshin

Copyright © written by Nobuhiro Watsuki

Published by Shueisha in Jump

Semiprecious by Nominis Expers

I am now thirty-six years old. Though that is so, my profession has led me to stay in great shape compared to many people my age. I have also heard how women find me to be handsome. I have always had that case even when only a young teen. Then again, I grew up early. I was just naturally serious.

I am with Misao as I am every day. Yes, everyday. We are not together all the time but we have come to spend time together very often. I blend into the crowd the best I can. As I do so, I keep my gaze on the young woman ahead of me. She is bouncing along as she always did when younger.

I am glad she has not changed much. Yes, it is relieving to know she is calmer about her moods, but she still is as open as ever. Being with her is so unlike the world I used to live in where it was best to keep your emotions hidden to have an upper hand. She does not plan her moves with me and most of the time I do not have to worry about what she thinks. She showed it openly.

She is still Okashira and holds it with pride. Despite now was the time of peace; she still wanted to keep the clan strong. They rarely added in members, but she took in recruits who really needed a place of belonging. That reminds me of how I was with my fallen men. My features soften in gentle remorse.

I do not feel as much shame as I had in the past. I still feel it, yes, but I have come to terms that they chose to die willingly. They were proud of their ability to protect me. All they wanted was to be remembered as was by me. They only wanted me to be proud of them. As long as they had that, they were content. Humble pride.

I shut my eyes for a moment of respect and memory to them. I can only hope I can make them proud now. I only wish to know if they approve of how I lead my life now. Gazing at the woman before me, I feel they probably were content with the simple road I walked down currently.

Despite I do not say much, my feelings were deep and intense. They always had been and I always had worked on keeping them controlled. It took many years to be able to break down my barriers. I am starting to accept what I am now. Now I have to learn how to live as a person that is his own.

I am learning not to eye people critically to find weaknesses and strengths as though I still am a person who only leads others. I am teaching myself not to fear a slip of the mask, as I no longer deal in such a world anymore. There was no longer need to hide my intentions to achieve my goals, and Misao helps me everyday to remember that…

* * *

It all started out simple. She always came to him in the temple to keep him company. She talked freely and told bad jokes. For a long time he just ignored her. She made it difficult for him to concentrate. She made it difficult for him to be able to make things difficult for himself. It was perhaps the best way for her to start.

As time wore on he learned how to block her out and he entered his inner turmoil. To get over your problems you had to face them. He always did that to get over his fears. He did that everyday but all it did was make him feel worse. He relished in it though. He had soiled the name of the Oniwabanshuu and he had dirtied the memory of Hannya, Hyotokko, Beshimi and Shikijo.

Aoshi's gaze held guilt for a moment, thinking upon his past actions. Misao had left one day to stay with Himura. Yes, he finally stopped calling the man Battousai. He no longer needed to live in the past now. He now lived in the present. He began doing that the day he noticed Misao's presence missing.

He never thought it would affect him so. He never spoke to her except on rare occasions with brief words. Aoshi always blocked her out when he tried to meditate. It was a wrinkle, which could not be smoothed though. He found he missed her bringing tea to him. Her being there did affect him more than he knew. She had been there and was loyal. Somehow, she reminded him of his comrades.

Okina had asked him to join Omasu and Okon on their trip to Tokyo. He did not show it, but he was relieved to know she would be coming back. It would have been best to get away he thought. He would retrace the steps he had walked on long ago and reflect. Most of all, he wanted to see her again sooner.

The day they arrived, he stood looking the other way. He did not feel her presence yet. He froze when he felt her though. He had listened to her voice and it was as refreshing as it always had been. He snapped out of his daze when he noticed Okon note his presence. When he turned he blinked when he saw her standing there. Unable to think anything more as his eyes stayed locked on her he went forward and did his job by giving her the note they were sent to deliver.

He had been at loss as to what was in the note that upset her so, but he gave no reaction when he watched her run off. She wanted to be alone and he would accept that. He understood the need for alone time well and if Misao needed it of all people, then he got the message.

That day things began to shift. Many memories before the tragedy of his life resurfaced and he understood why he felt a sort of peace when it came to the young girl. She had always been the lighter side of his past and she was now the lighter side of his present. He was grateful she was still her and that she remembered him.

The day he nearly killed Okina he saw Misao again for the very first time after about a decade. He did not know her anymore and she meant nothing to him then. She was a stranger and he had no reason to care about anyone. It was not until he was told she cried for him did he realize she did remember him and he had those who cared about him. His men were ashamed of him. He knew that day they were. His obsession had taken over him and he would be nothing but a broken man who hurt those he was supposed to protect.

Aoshi's intense gaze dulled sadly at that knowledge.

That day he decided he would repent to his comrades. He found later that it was not to them he should have been apologizing to. He needed to ask forgiveness from those he had left behind. They forgave him easily despite how confusing it was. They all understood something he did not while he thought it was the other way around.

Aoshi then remembered the day Misao told him that she liked him.

He had paused, surprised by her words… He did not respond, but he remembered one morning, long before she gave her confession that day, she was chatting to him as he meditated. She spoke of doing a joke on someone and started telling him what she did, "I went up to Sano and did this…" She kissed him on the cheek then. It sent a slight flutter down his back. He found he felt an emotional affection for her. Hearing her words left him in shock and he did not really know how to handle them. He never responded to her words.

After that day though, he wondered how he loved her. Love was not something he understood well as he spent most his life keeping feelings subtle and under constraint. Now he believed he does love her, but it was in an incomparable way. She was like a sister and a friend combined, but it somehow went deeper than that. He felt like she was a part of him and vise versa. It was a bond- a form of mutual understanding.

Like him, she wore her masks. He had observed her the past years. She was still cheerful as ever, but she had her brief moments where she let the façade slip and he saw how serious she really was. He in mirror held a grim image while he found he held just as much emotion as she, but in different terms. They were mirrors of each other.

Aoshi smiled faintly at the thought.

It was odd to know they were so alike but in a black against white sort of way. When side-by-side, though, they made a calm gray. He knew. He had seen how he wore off on her. She controlled herself better. However, it amused him when she would do her Kecho Kick on rare occasions when she forgot to contain herself. She did not raise her voice as much but it still was jovial and full of life as it was when she was sixteen.

It relieved him to see her familiarity. So much had changed and she was a part of his past that was still not tarnished. Despite that, time had brought on change. He did not know her like he had in the past. He had to learn to lead his own life and to accept the changing times. After that day, they slowly started to spend more time together. It was so gradual that it was hard to really notice the differences. It happened though.

Each passing year he began to know her. He became reacquainted. She opened her heart and emotions to him. She told him things that not even the others knew. She trusted him and that affected him deeply. Not knowing what he could ever give back in return, he decided to try to share things with her as well.

Aoshi's face held a faint reluctant look to it thinking upon that.

He did not have many good things to tell her though. His memories of better times were so far away now. When he did remember something decent, he would share it with her. It relieved him whenever her face lit up with joy. It was in the past years he finally told her faintly about his worse memories. She was older and proved she could handle it. Her eyes dimmed but they still showed understanding and compassion. It seemed she would always forgive him.

Breaking from his thoughts for a moment, Aoshi gave Misao a brief nod of the head as she asked him if she looked okay with a certain hair decoration she modeled. His gaze relaxed. Her hair was shoulder length now. She cut it near her eighteenth birthday. Omasu had cried out in surprise when she stumbled upon the girl lopping off her greatly prided hair.

It had surprised him as well. He let them be as the older woman was chastising her about how it was all jagged and crooked. Not wanting to intrude or embarrass her, he minded his own business by going back to the temple to meditate. An hour or so later she came in with the tea. She had her back turned to him as she did preparations and he took time to study her.

It was odd to not see the long braid run down her back animatedly moving with her. He remembered her finally turning to look at him, her cheeks slightly painted from a blush of embarrassment and fear that he might not like the change. At that moment though, he thought that she was pretty that way. The way her hair framed her appealing eyes and the smell of vanilla about her captivated him. He had noticed all of that in less than a second and forgot what it was that made her turn around in the first place.

Aoshi snapped out of his thoughts when he felt her tug on his sleeve and he eyed her questionably as she led him off to see the other sights of the town. She would always be so full of life, would she not? She had so much it seemed ever so slowly to seep into him with each passing day. It was strange at times.

He remembered when his face would automatically try to smile at something silly she did. His facial muscles would be so used to not expressing his feelings for most of his life that a smile never appeared. His face was not used to being relaxed for such a long time. He had found it so frustrating and found it to be quite pathetic that he apparently did not know how to smile. Even meditating did not ease it enough, but then again most of his thoughts were dark at first.

He knew she wanted him to smile. It was obvious with how she made lame jokes when younger. She wanted him to feel happiness like how she did. His gaze softened. How little she knew that she had brought more joy into his life now than he ever had for his first twenty-six years of living.

His life was content now. He ran the inn and lived an average life. The most he ever had to really worry about was keeping the business running smoothly and keeping up with bills and such. At first, he found the mundane life foreign and dull. Working with people in such a way was awkward at first, since in his previous profession, he mainly had given orders and people automatically understood him.

Misao stayed by his side, as did the others. They helped him ease into the different situations and soon he found the simple life was actually quite relaxing, even more so than meditating as odd as it was. He still meditated yes, but only in the early hours of the morning with Misao joining him.

Aoshi's lips softly held a ghost of a smile on them.

Over time he found he could pick up his swords again one day while he watched Misao and the others train with each other so they would never get rusty. Though there was little point for her to get more advanced as there were no terrible threats nowadays, he decided to train her. Okina had highly disapproved of her being caught up in the life of a ninja. Miaso never could be caged though. She had it in her blood.

Considering she never had any real training and merely had the memories of when Hannya helped teach her basics, she had done rather well excelling herself on her own. He decided to would not hurt to help her surpass her abilities. Her eyes lit when he offered to instruct her. From that day on, they spent time training with each other and he watched her grow into a formidable fighter against him.

She helped him be reborn and they made each other grow. He reflected on the words she said not long ago about always being with him…

"Aoshi! Are you alive in there?"

He broke out of his thoughts to look down at his friend's pouting face.

"Yes."

She smiled up at him used her arms to gesture for him to look around. Doing so, he looked at their surroundings. When did they get here?

"I found this glade not too long ago. I thought it was pretty and wanted to share it with you." She smiled contently.

Trumpet lilies decorated the area and gave of a sweet scent.

"Lilium rubellum." He murmured appreciatively.

Misao nodded happily.

"Yes. I remembered when little I saw them with you and you told me that then as well." She said softly, "They say white lilies have to do with death, but they remind me of rebirth for some reason. Perhaps it is because they seem so pure."

She smiled wistfully at the thought. With that, the tall man crouched down and picked one. He placed it lovingly in her hair.

"They suit you perfectly then."

Fin.

* * *

Notes: Th is my second attempt at a Rurouni Kenshin fanfiction. This is somewhat a follow up to my story "Bittersweet". I am not polished when it comes to knowing the series, thus there are likely many mistakes. If you have complaints to that, then read many other fictions regarding the two. I am sure others have done equally in amount of any possible damage.


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